This is the 1st in a series on VBACs: Vaginal Birth After Cesarean
This subject is personal and controversial
Our goal is to do our best to be vulnerable while offering education and encouragement to seek out the BEST decisions for your family according to how God designed us, both in body and in mind. Join us as we share our journey and please comment, question, and offer education where you are able!
Monumental moments on our VBAC journey:
June 25th, 2010: Mylin Hadassah Draper enters the world and our lives via unexpected c-section after 26+ hours of laboring in a hospital. We thought the hospital birthing class we took would prepare us for the unmedicated birth experience we wanted. We thought the nurses and doctors on call would make the best decisions for us based on our birth plan. We thought we had advocates and supporters in the medical professionals who attended us during labor. We trusted their judgment, suggestions, and comfort. We were not wrong on all of these accounts – but we did not get the experience we wanted and came away a little traumatized, greatly disappointed, somewhat depressed and very confused.
June 2nd, 2012: Sullivan Joel Draper enters the world and our lives via emergency c-section after plans to have a VBAC. We did not educate ourselves on what a VBAC entailed. It wouldn’t have mattered with this situation. A cord prolapse is very rare and across-the-board a reason to have an emergency c-section. We are and will forever be SO GRATEFUL that God created minds to develop other ways to deliver babies so that mommies and newborns can survive trauma.
May 1st, 2013: I find out I’m pregnant!
June 4th, 2013: My first appt with my OB/GYN that delivered both my children. She adamently explains that in no way would she let me attempt a VBAC with this birth. She didn’t explain all the statistics, but very clearly stated it would be a poor decision. We would go ahead and schedule a ‘nice, simple c-section’ when I would be 39 weeks. I knew this information was coming, but I was heartsick and heartbroke. I cannot believe I would never experience an unmedicated vaginal birth. I cannot believe that (according to my physician and most others in our area/country/culture) we would have a ‘cap’ on how many children would be in our family because my body could not continue to take surgery after surgery after surgery to deliver them. Hope left. Sadness and depression crept in. Regret and guilt surfaces. Anger began to flare.
July 18th, 2013: I meet with my mentor and have her speak truth into my life about lies I’m believing as a mother. This conversation specifically gave me freedom from the feelings that were creeping in as a result of the impending c-section. I look back on this date as the beginning of God healing my heart from the past, wiping our emotions clean, and preparing us (unbeknownst to us) for our upcoming VBAC calling.
September 7th, 2013: Zoe Denise Draper (our niece) is born. As we meet her and visit with her parents in the hospital, I am overcome by a deep desire to have what they had – a vaginal birth – once again. We leave the hospital and I cry. I pour a little bit of my heart’s desire out to Joel and tell him something like, ‘this (a scheduled c-section) CAN’T be what is in store for us…’ The longing creeps back in. The obsession starts. Our VBAC journey kicks off.
September 11th, 2013: I share my heart with another mentor in my Mom Life group that is a doula and passionate about all things pregnancy, birth, and baby related. Through tears I briefly tell her my situation and confess my longing. Through tears she encourages me, comforts me, and challenges me that I CAN have the birth experience I desire and there ARE many professionals out there that will help me attain it. I am renewed, motivated, determined, and beginning to feel hopeful again.
To be continued….